


A sign

by BizzlRoklyptc



Category: Backstreet Boys
Genre: Childhood Trauma, F/F, F/M, Human Trafficking, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-20
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-24 21:23:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20712758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BizzlRoklyptc/pseuds/BizzlRoklyptc





	1. Chapter 1

The pen tapped the notepad a few times before completing the stride of words. "I'm sorry." 

The hazel eyes peered at the letters on the paper numerous times. "I can't do this anymore." "I drag you down." "You'll be better off without me." Sentence after sentence the words stated back. Water stains on the paper. Tears. 

As the last words made its final form from the pen. His hand began to shake. He couldn't bring himself to sign it couldn't finish the ending. He didn't want it to end. But he needed it to. He had to.

The pen was laid in its case for the last time. The letter folded and stuffed inside a stationary envelope. As he held the letter in his hands. Tears falling from his face. Taking in a deep breath. He made up his mind. Something he needed to do.

"C'mon Kev. You made up your mind. You have to do this."

Kevin made his way out of his room shutting the door quietly. Making sure he didn't wake up his wife and two sons. Creeping down the stairs without hesitation. The cold air filled the halls. Kevin normally fixed the thermostat so Kristin didn't have to. This time he left it alone. 

Once Kevin made it to the front door. He triggered the alarm off. Without making any noise. He was successful. Taking in that breathe that he held in from upstairs. Kevin turned the knob and opened the door slowly. As soon as Kevin's foot hit the threshold. He heard a noise.

"Daddy?"

It was max. Kevin's heart stopped. He turned to the little blonde hair boy in pajamas. Max walked up to Kevin wanting to be picked up. Kevin held his composer. "Hey baby. Listen..daddy has to go away for awhile… I need you to back upstairs to bed ok?" Kevin's eyes swelled up with tears as Max looked up at him. Max was only 5. He didn't understand. Kevin kneeled down and kept his distance. "You're my little buddy right?" Kevin asked In between straining his voice. Max nodded. 

"And you'll keep a secret for me right?" Max noddre again. Max always wanted to be his dad's helper. Being there and being his go to kid. He was never big enough to do big kid things. "Daddy is going away but when mommy asks you, you tell her you haven't seen me…. Ok?" Max understood keeping a promise. He didn't understand that he would be lying to his mother and older brother. 

"Ok daddy…" 

Kevin reached his hand and patted max on the head. Giving him a kiss on the forehead and backing away. Kevin didn't turn back. He knew max would watch him leave. When the door shut, Kevin's heart sank and tears poured down. Grabbing the duffel that sat on the steps. Kevin ran to his jeep and started the engine. Not thinking about it for a second. He didn't look back. What he did know is max saw him leave. Staring out of the window waving goodbye to his daddy. Thinking he would see him again.


	2. Chapter 2

Kevin pulled up to the top level of a parking garage. Keeping the lights and engine running. Watching the lights flicker above the city in LA. in Kevin's hands he held a large bottle of Percocet. In the passenger seat sat a large bottle of Jack Daniel's Whiskey. It was half way gone. And so were the pills. 

"C'mon Kev. Do it." He said aloud. "Just turn the car off and get out. And jump. Just like you planned."

Turning the car off and clutching the bottle into his hands he staggered out of the driver seat. Kevin could hold the liquor really well. The pills is what he didn't agree with. He had thrown them up 2 times driving up the hill to the garage. Almost back to being sober. 

"Shit… get it together." He heard a voice say. Kevin looked around. He had planned this for months. Nobody would be up here at this time of night. It's 4am. Who would be here??

Placing the bottle in his car and following the voice. Kevin found himself near a ledge. Close to the end of it was a woman. With red hair. She held a gun to her head. Kevin's eyes grew at least 10 times the size. 

"Hey...hey ...miss?? Are you ok?" Kevin tried to gain himself together. 

The woman turned to him. She wasn't phased that she was face to face with Kevin Richardson. She was more so astounded that she wasn't alone. 

"What are you doing here." She was more drunk than he was. Her speech slurred and she stumbled quite a bit. The wind picked up ever since Kevin stepped towards the ledge. The woman held the gun in her hands close to her head. "Aren't you supposed to be home with your wife…" 

Her tone was sharp. Very cold. Kevin ignored it. "You're hurt. Im sorry-"

"You lied. You told me Brian knew." Kevin stared at her. "He doesn't. He has no idea. Seriously what are you doing up here? Get down before you hurt yourself. " 

The woman was someone Kevin knew. He was acquainted with her very well since she was a friend of Brian. "Listen. Why don't you get down and tell me what happened. If you fall. It'll be a nasty report the police will have to write and I'm sure you don't want your students to find out about this."

Quiet. Kevin was right. The woman was a teacher at the sports center. She taught basketball to children 5 to 19 years old. She loved the kids and her job. So why was she here?

Kevin still clutched the bottle in hand. He raised it up to her. "Have a drink with me. And let's talk. Deal??"   
"What's the catch." She asked. 

"Give me the bullets. You have a drink with me and talk. No cops. No cousin. Deal?" 

With a shaky hand the woman unloaded the gun and handed Kevin the bullets. He helped her down the ledge and sat her down on the concrete.


	3. Chapter 3

Sip after sip Kevin and the woman shared the whiskey bottle. "You want to tell me why you're here Kevin?" She seemed to come down off her high. Kevin was so focused on getting her down he forgot why he was here. 

"Things are crazy. I'd rather not talk about it."  
Kevin wanted to forget why he even came out there.  
"You were going to jump weren't you?"she asked. Kevin sighed along with the wind that was around them. Hoping she didn't hear it.

"Yea. I was. The divorce is kicking my ass. I went over there to reconcile but Kristin told me there was no way..so I made my choice. What about you?" 

He handed her the bottle and she started to talk. "Well. Brian told me it was over between his wife and him. He wanted to think things through before coming to me. He makes it seem like I asked him to leave his wife. It's not true." The woman stared at the tattooed name on her arm. "Eden." 

"I know that. But you know how Brian is. He wanted to make sure the slate was clean." Kevin looked around the parking garage. He noticed a car pulling up and turning the lights off. "Well. If anything that will definitely happen tonight. C'mon get up." 

Kevin stood up easily himself. Helping Eden was the hard part. She was a lightweight. She could barely stand up. Sitting was the easy part. Someone got out of the car and walked towards Kevin and Eden. Holding her up. Kevin made sure she knew she was not in danger. 

"Hey kev." Brian approached them slowly. Kevin could tell his cousin had been up for a long period of time. His face definitely showed it. "Is she ok?" Brian asked. Kevin struggled to hold up Eden. She blacked out from the drinking. Kevin didn't even notice. "I'll help her get in the car." 

The two carried her to the car so brian could take her home. "How did you know she was out here?" Brian asked wrapping the seatbelt around Eden. Kevin didn't want to tell his cousin he went out there to end his life. "I. Came out to think..and saw her. Brian what's wrong with her?" 

Brian looked at Eden sleeping soundly in the front seat. "Nothing wrong..she's just tired. And I'm not helping the situation. I've been looking for her for days Kev. If you hadn't found her she probably would have done it. Thank you Kev." The emotion Kevin felt overwhelmed him. The woman he and his cousin knew was thinking of ending her life just as well. And Kevin knew why. 

"Brian. You need to tell her you know that she's pregnant. Walking around as If you're relationship doesn't matter is hurting her. She isn't out here because she is tired. She was out here because she wasn't being heard. If you're afraid to love her, let get go. Seriously. Don't play with her."

Kevin made sure his words would stick with Brian. He knew his cousin wasn't stupid. He just didn't understand his current situation. Brian and Kevin told his goodbyes. As Brian drove off, Kevin waved goodbye again. With tears in his eyes. Stumbling back towards the building ledge. Kevin stepped on something firm. It was Eden's gun. His heart racing. Kevin's eyes grew 10 times the size they were. Slowly bending down to pick up the gun. Loading the bullets. Kevin slowly took in a breath. 

"LORD.. I come to you. Full of sin. Doubtful and lost. Show me a sign. Please. I don't want to hurt anymore. Help me…." Kevin broke down. Crying and shaking. He didn't want to die. He wanted to live. He wanted to see his boys grow up. He wanted to grow old with his wife. Be there for his family. But he wanted to stop suffering. He wanted to be better. 

He saved a woman tonight and could carefully save himself. Was there more to his life than just being a father and husband? Kevin collapsed on the ground staring at the gun in his hands. Staring for a while. Time stood still. Flashes of Kevin's life came in frames. The birth of his sons. His wedding. His graduation from high school. His cousin's wedding. The death of his father… In a mere second. The gun went off. 

The next few days were unbearable. The morning after Kevin found Eden on the ledge of the garage, he had stopped her from making the biggest mistake of her life. He saved her from a suicide attempt. He knew things about her that Brian hadn’t found out yet. That next morning, someone that cleans the garage found Kevin’s body slumped near his car. Next to the car and Jack Daniels. The man ignored it thinking he was asleep. After an hour of cleaning, the man noticed Kevin’s body was not moving. Deciding to move him on his own so that he could finish cleaning.

“Hey man, cmon I gotta finish. Get up.” The man tapped Kevin with his foot. No movement. 

“Hey, yo. Guy, Get the hell up! Take your drunk ass elsewhere..”   
The man reached down to grab Kevin but came to the shock his body was cold to the touch and he was not breathing. The man panicked and dropped Kevin where he stood. Rushing away to get help. The man hoped he wasn’t dead. 

Within the hour, ambulance and police arrived to get Kevin’s body. The family was notified immediately when they found Kevin’s wallet in the dash of his car. They contacted Brian first. As instructed on his wallet. Police talked to the man that found Kevin and wanted to know every detail. The man didn’t know Kevin nor had he seen him at all. “He wouldn’t move. I don’t know I was kind of in a panic ...” 

Was all he could say. The man was devastated. He had never seen anything like this before. Nothing like this has ever really been seen in that neighborhood before either. Everything that Kevin touched was taken in for evidence. Until Brian could come identify his body. Nothing was to be released until questions were answered. Why was he up there? And why did he do it?

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End file.
